I’m very interested in the truth of who I am and the truth of who others are and represent around me! Lately I find myself wanting to be ok with the messy parts of my life. The parts that feel unsure, insecure, covered up cause they probably don’t look really good on the outside, or the fear that people are judging you one way or another. 

I think in my own personal life it’s been easy to want to run out of every storm that messes with the the flow of certainties! The type of storm that stops the flow of vision and all you can see is what’s in front of you. I find myself looking for that constant silver lining, the next and better/great church, friendship, or identity for that matter. What I’ve found to be true is that through each challenge and season I am growing, my family is growing. Contentment, egos, selfishness, judgement have all been tested hard especially when I see myself feeling less than what I “should” be. I instead of looking at the truth of who I am, am more likely to sink into the whole of despair and dance with my own expectations/entitlement, and opinions of what people should be to me. Life isn’t exactly a fair game. But what matters most is people.

Giving people a fair chance. Judging less and just being what they damn need. Creating a home that exudes peace, and love. Loving on the simple things like ;rest, a cozy space, little toes in your hands, playing a game with your children, or just walking outside for fresh air. I want to create an environment in my home that expects kindness, compassion, and hospitality because that’s what our friends are in need of and wanting.

 I think Marriage is messy, parenting is messy, and even our homes can be messy. That doesn’t define me, my willingness and honesty to show and be seen in the trenches of life as well as the highs teaches me “people do come first and perfection is indeed the thief of joy.” Today I’m choosing and trusting to let others in on my less than perfect life, and in doing so I pray that I have the honor of connecting with another’s story or life or hardship. I pray I choose to break down the walls of discontentment, expectations, and perfectionism so that contentment is always at the forefront of my heart and mind through the good, messy, and hard seasons of motherhood, family, and relationships. 


Photos by: @angelarosegonzalez


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